I wonder... Does everyone handle hurt the same way I do?
Not just your every-day sort of hurt. A very-deep hurt. A hurt received from someone by whom you would never expect to be purposely hurt...over-and-over again.
Hurt by a person that should be one you could go to to receive comfort when you are hurt elsewhere.
A person that was put in charge of your place of refuge and refreshment.
A hurt so bad that you have to leave the place where you have found spiritual help and solace since you were a child. A place that you have to leave before you find it impossible to forgive...again...again...
I know it's not the place that really helps me, it's the Helper that meets me there.
And so, I, and the precious husband God gave me, seek for a new house of worship, a place without the hindrance of hurt feelings to bask again in that refreshment. Solace. Peace.
And back again I go to my question: Does everyone handle hurt the same way I do?
Do they vacillate between hurt/ shock/ anger/ talk/ pull-inside-themselves-and-seek-comfort stages? Then do they get to the With God's help I will beat this and I will be better for it stage? The I am Amazed stage... only to wake up the next morning in the hurt/shock stage again?
Well, Dear Diary, guess which stage I'm in today? The pull-inside-myself-and-seek-comfort stage.
It's a good place in this journey because this is the stage where I'm learning so much. I'm learning I am not alone in this. I'm learning that I am actually growing through this. I will be a stronger person because of this and hopefully I can help someone else through this same kind of hurt some day with real empathy and gratitude for the Help I have received. I am finding great peace when I rest in God and take time out to enjoy His beautiful creation while in this stage.
And just one more thing Dear Diary, I could suspend myself above all my troubles in one of these beautiful, cuddly, hanging chairs. This is my birthday month and the daisy chair is my favorite ... just in case anyone asks...hint, hint, hint. : )
Not just your every-day sort of hurt. A very-deep hurt. A hurt received from someone by whom you would never expect to be purposely hurt...over-and-over again.
Hurt by a person that should be one you could go to to receive comfort when you are hurt elsewhere.
A person that was put in charge of your place of refuge and refreshment.
A hurt so bad that you have to leave the place where you have found spiritual help and solace since you were a child. A place that you have to leave before you find it impossible to forgive...again...again...
I know it's not the place that really helps me, it's the Helper that meets me there.
And so, I, and the precious husband God gave me, seek for a new house of worship, a place without the hindrance of hurt feelings to bask again in that refreshment. Solace. Peace.
And back again I go to my question: Does everyone handle hurt the same way I do?
Do they vacillate between hurt/ shock/ anger/ talk/ pull-inside-themselves-and-seek-comfort stages? Then do they get to the With God's help I will beat this and I will be better for it stage? The I am Amazed stage... only to wake up the next morning in the hurt/shock stage again?
Well, Dear Diary, guess which stage I'm in today? The pull-inside-myself-and-seek-comfort stage.
It's a good place in this journey because this is the stage where I'm learning so much. I'm learning I am not alone in this. I'm learning that I am actually growing through this. I will be a stronger person because of this and hopefully I can help someone else through this same kind of hurt some day with real empathy and gratitude for the Help I have received. I am finding great peace when I rest in God and take time out to enjoy His beautiful creation while in this stage.
Sending gentle hugs, sweet Sherry....
ReplyDeleteI'm a pull into myself type of person. When my son got sick I wanted to crawl under a rock and hide, took me a long time to stick my head back out Even now, seven years later, I prefer the solace and comfort of home above all else.
Those pictures of serene and cuddly... I hope you find peace....
gena
Thank you for the kind words and loving hugs Gena. Home is certainly a good place to heal.
DeleteOh, Sherry, it hurts so much when people hurt us. People we love and trust. A wise person once said that when we forgive, we aren't letting that person off the hook, but getting their hook out of you! I hope you find a new place to worship without the reminders of hurt. I love your chairs. I'd like to crawl right up into that second one! My birthday is this month, too, dear friend! You ARE a beautiful creation and God made you perfectly! Love, Twyla
ReplyDeleteI'm very thankful for your friendship Twyla. That truly is a wise saying about forgiveness. I'm going to remember that. I know that I must forgive in order to be forgiven. I'm now working on the turning loose of the hurt and moving on.
DeleteBy the way, Sherry, what day IS your birthday? I would love to send you a card. Could you send me your address to our email? Have a sweet day! Twyla
ReplyDeleteYou're so sweet Twyla! My birthday is the 17th and I'll email you my address. When is yours?
ReplyDeleteHello! Nice to see you again. I, too, have been seriously hurt, but by a friend of many, many years, something I'd never imagined she would do. It's been over a year and I still miss her and our friendship. The pain of her actions has faded and, while I think I understand what drove her to behave as she did, I have lost trust in her. Unfortunately and sadly, I don't believe that will ever return so our friendship is at an end. I can assure you though that you really will feel better with time.
ReplyDeleteIt's hard to believe anyone would hurt someone as sweet as you Lesa. Thank you so much for your encouraging words.
DeleteOh Sherry, Why are people so mean? I am so sorry this happened to you! I have had something similar. Our pastor's wife who I thought was my friend said something really, really personal and ugly about me in church and I heard her. Unfortunately not an isolated event- this is who she is. I was/ am so hurt. I struggled and prayed for a long time. I finally made the decision that God would not want me helping to support anyone who gave him a bad name. It has been hard- had to leave some really lovely people but I am at peace with my decision. Still hurts but... I draw in when I am wounded as well- maybe a natural protective instinct. It has made me think a lot about myself as well- while I could never be the unkind person she is, I have questioned how am I prideful, ungenerous, etc. Since we have left several people have said they left the church because of her but I am not talking about her. I have told only one dear friend about the incident. Well I am so glad you are healing. I guess everyone has been there in some way or other. Sending hugs your way, Angela
ReplyDeleteThanks Angela. It sounds like you went through the same process I'm going through. I'm so sorry we've both had to go through it but I'm sure we're stonger women because of it. Blessings to you!
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